Teaching, fatherhood and mental health: how can we support parent-teachers?

In our previous blog, we explored the experiences of teachers who are mothers, and trends regarding their mental health according to two key studies.  In this blog, we turn our attention to how we can support our male colleagues as they become parents.

We know that teachers are most likely to become fathers between the ages of 30-34, and by the time they reach their forties, 71% of male teachers are dads.  This is a lower percentage than the 82% of 40-44 year olds who are mothers which is interesting in itself: is teaching a father-friendly profession? 

In 2015 Kell found that male teachers perceive fatherhood as having a ‘dramatic’ impact on their performance at work, but  there was an equal spilt between those participants in the study who felt that this impact was positive as those who felt it was negative.  As with mothers, the study revealed the sometimes-conflicting distinction of the father-teacher identity:

• Participants both enjoyed the ‘kudos’ resulting from the ‘fatherhood bonus’ but also felt overwhelmed by both work and home life
• The pressure to provide financially for their families conflicted with the desire to be present and the guilt that their children’s lives were passing them by
• Career progression that came with ease (in comparison to mothers) was tainted by the guilt of seeing their partners’ professional aspirations ‘absolutely trashed to pieces’

New fatherhood and mental health – a national picture

It’s now fairly common knowledge that perinatal mental health conditions affect fathers just as they do mothers: a 2021 study found that up to 15% of fathers experience perinatal depression or anxiety, ‘with rates increasing when mothers are also experiencing perinatal mental health disorders.’ 

Despite these figures, many fathers report being routinely ignored or excluded by healthcare services and employers.  Schools and other educational organisations are far from being alone in framing mothers as the default parent through their formal family leave policies, and cultures surrounding flexible working.

A 2019 NCT study found that 38% of new fathers were worried about their mental health, with short periods of paternity leave, and men’s reluctance to talk about their feelings often cited as adding additional complexity to their experiences.  For teachers, returning to work full-time after a short paternity leave into busy school environments, can trigger new stresses, or exacerbate existing mental health conditions. 

Teacher paternity pay – a poor deal for fathers

Fathers and non-birthing partners are entitled to two consecutive weeks of paternity leave paid at statutory rate if they meet certain qualifying conditions of employment.  A further four weeks of unpaid parental leave can also be taken, but this is often reliant on family finances. 

In many cases, the first or both weeks of paternity leave are paid in full at the discretion of the headteacher.  Some employers will allow the two weeks to be taken separately, particularly if a holiday falls in the middle of the block of paternity leave. However, neither of these options are entitlements protected by the Burgundy Book. 

For Justin, a senior leader at an independent school, things looked very different.  An IVF journey resulted in the happy news of twins, due in the middle of March.  Justin had already handed in his resignation at his previous school to move to a new post in the following April, at which point he had been told that he wouldn’t be entitled to paternity leave – despite still being employed during this time.

Justin’s children arrived prematurely at the beginning of February, and he was still not granted any paid leave.  He said, “It was a pretty stressful time as one of our babies was in the neonatal intensive care unit for a few weeks. I was upset and worried and one of the doctors treating our babies said I was too stressed to work and signed me off.  Even when I sent in my sick note, I was told I needed to plan for the weeks I would be off.”

Whilst this would be considered as refusal of his statutory rights, Justin said, “I was too busy and stressed to even think about anything else apart from the babies.”

It is also worth noting new legislation from April 2025 would have given Justin the right to a week's leave for every week his twins were in intensive care.

Nationally, campaign groups like Pregnant then Screwed and the Fatherhood Institute are calling for improvements to paternity leave and pay, including day one entitlements that would have better supported colleagues like Justin. 

Research from the Centre for Progressive Policy has shown that a minimum of 6 weeks paternity leave, paid at 90% of normal earnings, has a positive impact on the gender pay gap, and a large body of evidence also indicates that a father’s presence in the first year of their child’s life results in positive outcomes for both child and mother.  Guaranteed, paid time off would undoubtably also have a positive impact on new fathers’ mental health.

According to Teacher Tapp, the teaching profession couldn’t agree more!  77% of teachers believe that paternity leave should be longer, but this is nothing new.  In Kell’s 2015 study, paternity leave and pay was raised as an issue, with improvements to policies at national level recommended.

 

Improving and equalising parental leave and pay

Improving and equalising parental leave and pay was one of the recommendations in The MTPT Project and New Britain Project’s 2024 Missing Mothers report. 

Over the last decades, many industries have embraced improved and equal parental leave as an attractive employee benefit, including the Department for Education, who offer 28 weeks fully paid leave to all parents.  There are also at least three local authorities or MATs offering improved or equal paternity leave to employees, proving that this is a viable option for schools.

Internationally, the impact of extended paternity leave on men’s mental health is inconclusive, in part due to the huge variance in time offered across OECD countries.  UK studies, however, mostly focus on the positive outcomes: a 2023 National Centre for Social Research study found that “Fathers taking SPL (shared parental leave) felt that it was more rewarding despite being harder work than expected”.  The study reported wellbeing benefits to fathers including, “building a strong bond with their child early in life”, “closely witnessing… key developments” and “being able to pay full attention to [their] child.”  Another UK study summarised: “the wellbeing of all fathers in the study appeared to flourish during a major life event that has a known association with mental health problems for many fathers”.

This was definitely the case for DeMarco Ryans, a secondary English teacher and KS4 Lead.  He took shared parental leave  and said, “It was an opportunity to pause and take in my partner and child as the people they were and the family we found ourselves to be. Seeing how much of my child emerged, at that time, was a salve to the weariness that teaching and middle leadership through Covid had developed. I built an amazing bond with my daughter during shared parental leave and it set the foundation for the type of father and husband I want to be.”

Flexibility and fatherhood

It is no secret that flexible working practices in education lag behind other industries, in part due to the constraints of a classroom teaching role, and the requirement for appropriate adult to child ratios on site.

Amongst male teachers, however, just 9% work part-time in comparison to 29% of female teachers.  In the wider workforce, 11% of men work part-time and are less likely than women to have some form of flexibility within a full-time role.

One of the strongest arguments for a flexible working culture is its positive impact on teacher wellbeing.  How far this impacts men and fathers, specifically, however, is unclear.  Indeed, an Edurio report indicates that men are actually significantly more likely to report feeling ‘very or quite well’ in comparison to women.  However, only 46% of men responded in this way and 23% stated that they felt ‘not very well’ or ‘not very well at all’ when asked about their physical and mental health.

When asked for their thoughts about the barriers to flexible and part-time working for male teachers, the fathers we spoke to for this blog highlighted four issues:

• Entrenched attitudes conflating masculinity, presenteeism and loyalty to school and students – “I’ve heard school leaders at conferences almost bragging about how little parental leave they took to somehow prove how committed they were to their school’s improvement journey”
• A ‘school of hard knocks’ attitude towards flexibility – current leaders did not have it, so why should they afford this to their staff?
• Gendered attitudes to whose careers should flourish (fathers) and whose should be put on the back burner (mothers)
• The fear of change – “the phrases ‘dangerous precedent’ or ‘that’ll be difficult for the timetable’ are so common”

According to our contributing fathers, all these attitudes build cultures within organisations, and make men either scared to ask for greater flexibility, or embed the assumption that it will not be granted even if it is requested.

When former headteacher, Daniel became a father for the second time, however, he prioritised the flexibility he needed for his family over what he describes as the ‘incredibly rewarding’ but ‘all-consuming’ role of headship:

“As a headteacher, I had to make sacrifices that wouldn’t allow me to be the father and husband I wanted to be.  Once, when I had to take a safeguarding call during dinner time, my eldest son commented: “Daddy’s always on his phone”, which really stung – he was right.  I knew this was unsustainable and I was letting both my family (and to a lesser extent my staff) down. 

“When my wife was attending a check-up when pregnant with our daughter, I found myself in the car park dealing with a relatively minor incident instead of being in the waiting room supporting my family.  The next day, I told my CEO I would be leaving in September and took up a Trust role at another organisation.  This has provided me with a new professional challenge and the flexibility to support my family: I do drop-offs every morning, work from home more often, and – crucially – the nature of the role allows me to better ‘turn off’ at the end of each day.”

With the average age of headteachers decreasing, Daniel points out, “more and more are battling with raising a young family at the same time”.  His experience forces us to question how sustainable our current approach to school leadership is, and how co-headship, support from central teams, or flexibility can make headship a more viable option for parents.

Making education an attractive career for fathers

 For school leaders keen to create environments that support the wellbeing of father-teachers, there are both quick-fix and more systemic actions that can be taken:

Parenting out loud

Campaigner Elliot Rae launched a simple, but effective campaign in 2021, calling on fathers to ‘parent out loud’ to affect a shift in workplace culture.  Fathers working in all school roles can be part of this movement, talking unashamedly about their caring responsibilities, explicitly resisting presenteeism and inviting conversations with other parents about balancing school and family life.

Inclusive family policies

Most of our family policies are “maternalistic” in that they favour the birth mother.  Whether it be the paltry leave and pay offered to fathers, or limited (unpaid) time off for antenatal appointments, fathers are blocked out of the parenting journey even before their baby arrives.  Taking the time to examine our policy documents and improve or equalise conditions wherever possible is an important value statement for your staff.

Improved / equalised parental leave and pay

Since paternity leave is already so terrible, there are lots of easy ways to make improvements: from introducing day 1 entitlements to the current two weeks offered by the Burgundy Book, all the way up to equalising parental leave for fathers and non-birthing partners.  Plenty of schools and MATs are already focusing on how they can do better for fathers, as appropriate to their context.

Flexible cultures

As we heard from Daniel, and know from research, flexible working is highly valued by employees – even ahead of financial renumeration.  Creating cultures where men feel as entitled to enjoy part-time and flexible working will be hugely helpful to both new fathers and the entire school workforce.

*Daniel and Justin are pseudonyms for colleagues who wanted to remain anonymous.

Emma Sheppard is the Founder of The MTPT Project, the UK’s charity for parent-teachers.  A former English teacher and Lead Practitioner, she is now the UK’s expert on the motherhood penalty in education. In 2024, Emma co-authored the Missing Mothers report with The New Britain Project, outlining the importance of equal and improved parental leave and pay to solving our current recruitment and retention crisis.